at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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