1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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