if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize