normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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