So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
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