I didn't shave. On purpose
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
