Pappa wants mamma naked
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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