i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Let's get the cat blown out
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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