..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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