Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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