Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I think a kid would responsible me up
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I think your dad took our porno
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
