yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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