I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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