Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
