it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
