Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
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