in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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