Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
