yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
