If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
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