whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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