his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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