I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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