Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
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