Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
