Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
