I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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