I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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