Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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