ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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