I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
