you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
