Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
that's an acceptable place to lick
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
