I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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