so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
