real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize