He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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