very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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