Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Randomize
