wat bout pragnant strippers??
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
