he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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