Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
