i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
