Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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