I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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