dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Randomize
