honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
