wat bout pragnant strippers??
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
