Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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