My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
