scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
