Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
