R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
