Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Randomize
