Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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