i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
